Don’t Be a Glenn

iSince I’ve been an iPhone iOwner, I’ve realized that anytime updates are involved- whether it’s for the phone or iTunes or just trying to get some more jams on my phone, the process makes you want to commit bloody murder. I’m at the point where I was frustrated because updating my iPhone was taking so long seems like a just cause for murder. It’s definitely a defense Saul Goodman could get behind.

Your honor, of course my client didn’t really want to kill that person. No one in their right mind wants to kill anyone. But you see, my client wasn’t in his right mind. Thanks to the overwhelmingly frustrating act of trying to get his iPhone updated to this new iOS whatever the kids are talking about, my client’s mind was in the furthest possible place from right. It was in a dark, dark place. It was in a place where he wasn’t able to think rationally, where it was removed from logic. And it was in this state, that my client ended up killing that person. Did he mean too? Heck, no. But could he stop himself? Sadly, no. My client is not the one who should be on trial here, your honor. The wait for the new sleek design of iOS7 is what should be on trial.

But I didn’t kill anyone. I killed myself a Mavericks burrito from Surf Taco. That was it. It was delicious.

Instead of doing any killing myself, I used this time to watch other people kill things.

I watched the first two episodes of season three of The Walking Dead.

The Good, the Bad & the Ugly of The Walking Dead: Season Three So Far…

The Good: It’s Killing Time

I lost count of how many zombies and bewildered prison inmates were killed in the first two episodes because I A) ran out of fingers & toes and B) at some point it became akin to white noise. But I’m not complaining. Hell no. After a second season that at times, was as exciting as watching paint dry, I was more than ready to welcome some excitement and action. Our not-so merry band of survivors are on the road, taking down effin’ zombies like gang busters and thankfully, doing more things like killing and acting than standing around, endlessly talking about doing both. Rick, so far, has ditched sermons on the burdens of leadership and is letting his actions speak. Which is good. Because Rick shouldn’t be allowed to say more than twenty words per episode. Twitter rules should apply to him (and probably the majority of the cast.) It was refreshing when the first episode opened in near silence.

And speaking of openings, the opening credit sequence has been updated and it’s awesome.


It perfectly captures the creepiness of The Walking Dead. The sense of impending doom is one of the things that makes the show so interesting and I love how that was conveyed in the opening.

The Bad: Emo Glenn is still alive

On a show largely consisting of characters I don’t like, Glenn might have the top spot locked up. Maggie has made him soft and mopey- not that he was all that cool before. But at least before he didn’t walk around look all sensi-sensi. He did things like run around and drive cars fast. Now he’s constantly vacillating between impressing his boo with his manliness and taking care of her.

Glenn, it’s a zombie apocalypse. Maggie is all yours. You do you, son. Grow a pair, please.

I know at least one of the main characters are probably going to die this season. Can the first one be Glenn?

The Ugly: Talking

I’m not a person who seeks out violence in television and movies. Except when I’m watching The Walking Dead. Why? Because I really can’t stand when the characters are talking to each other- especially when it’s just two of them. That’s all season two was (besides boring…hey yo!) – a string of scenes between two characters having dull conversations about the various pickles they found themselves in. If the cast was stronger, if the characters were more interesting then this wouldn’t be a problem. But seeing as how neither is especially true, it’s a bummer. It’s a Glenn, which is the phrase I just came up with for when something is a bummer on The Walking Dead. Anything involving Lori is usually a Glenn. Herschel talking is a Glenn. Scenes of characters coming to terms with the fruitlessness of their situation that last longer than three minutes are a Glenn.

Not a Glenn?

This scene…


Definitely an interesting twist that the killing of non-zombies seems to now come as easy to Rick as killing zombies does.

Overall I’m looking forward to this season, but The Walking Dead is definitely on relatively thin ice after season two.

Photos: AMC

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