Patton Oswalt For President

You want a third party candidate for President, a true third party candidate that you can get behind and feel absolutely wonderful about? Well forget Gary Johnson and exit stage left Jill Stein because we finally have a viable option- Patton Oswalt.

Oswalt crashes the Oval Office in the new video for Weezer’s “I Love the U.S.A.,” a song they wrote for NASA to celebrate space stuff and that appears on the deluxe edition of their latest album, The White Album. Oswalt, decked out in his patriotic best, sings along, shreds some guitar and gallivants around the office that is the prize for the raging dumpster fire of despair we all witnessed Sunday night and no, I’m not talking about the Giants/Packers’ game.

Listen, no one is thrilled with the candidates. Well, maybe except for the candidates themselves. But until now, it seemed like they were the ponies we were going to have to get behind because our other options were non-existent. Ssshh with your Gary Johnson nonsense please. That dude couldn’t be a substitute teacher in the worst public high school in the country. And Jill Stein? Every morning on my way to work, I pass a rundown house that has a a make-shift lawn sign, constructed with old two by fours and “Jill Stein” scrawled across it. That says all I need to know about her.

But President Patton Oswalt? I’m in.

And you should be too.

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