From the Pod: What America Needs (cont’d)

By Ryan O'Connell on 09/21/2017 • ( 0 )

On last week’s episode of Differing Opinions on Drake we talked about the return of Taylor Swift, something we had predicted for some time now. I mean, not to keep harping on this, but no really, we had been saying for a while she’d be back sometime in the fall of 2017 and this would lead to her performing at the Super Bowl. That Super Bowl halftime performance hasn’t been announced yet, but just wait. It’s going to happen. You know it, I know it, Elyse knows it, EVERYONE knows it.

We discussed the first two songs Swift has released from her upcoming album Reputation, “Look What You Made Me Do” and “…Ready for It?” Spoiler alert: we’re not a fan of either one. This actually led to us drawing comparisons between Swift and Donald Trump, going so far as to come to the conclusion that Taylor Swift is the Donald Trump of pop music, constantly picking fights and unable to let go of past slights and beefs. This seems like an accurate analogy.

“…Ready for It?” features not only music that sounds like outtakes from Kanye’s Yeezus sessions, but Swift kind of, sort of rapping. Yes, rapping. Taylor Swift rapping. Listening to it is not exactly a pleasant experience. To be honest, it makes absolutely no sense and to be even more honest, it really is the last thing America needs right now. We then proceeded to list of some things America does need right now.

Affordable healthcare
To get rid of these hurricanes
A shorter NBA season
A way to create a playlist of your favorite episodes of a TV show

As far as what America doesn’t need, it’s pretty straightforward.

Taylor Swift rapping
racism

But I’ve continued to think about, this idea of a list of what America needs right now. Here are some things I’d like to add to our list, listed in no particular order.

A way to feel good about watching the NFL
to get rid of ATM fees
to be able to cancel or change an airplane reservation for a reasonable fee
a nationwide-book exchange
more big time rock ‘n roll albums like the latest Foo Fighters’ release
a moratorium on Game of Thrones‘ posts, whether they are about theories about the show or about future spin-offs for four months
a grocery store for toddlers
less potholes
a place where we can store old CD cases
a day of remembrance for when Hootie & the Blowfish released “Let Her Cry”
a general refresher course on World War I
a separate Facebook for Moms
a new album by Justin Timberlake
Leonardo DiCaprio and Martin Scorcese to finally make a movie based on the book Devil in the White City
For them to realize it should be a limited series, not a movie
For Michael Schur to have his own podcast
sneakers that have an indicator strip on them, alerting you to when they need to be replaced
reruns of The Office
more Greek restaurants
a ban on goatees
a set price for certain beers (for instance: Miller Lite and PBR are always $2, no matter where you are)
a time limit for baseball games
more dog parks