Ways to Get Through Game of Thrones Withdrawal

Game of Thrones withdrawal is a real thing; a vicious disease. These aren’t cures, but distractions.

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159321198_2160c2It’s not on WebMD, but Game of Thrones withdrawal is a very real thing. The side effects are damn near devastating- an empty feeling on Sunday, emotions messed with unfairly upon remembering it’s not on anymore, potential overdosing of is he or isn’t he think pieces on Jon Snow’s future. It’s tough business and now two weeks removed from the season finale, the pain is still very real.

Now Game of Thrones withdrawal isn’t just going to go away, at least not anytime soon. So really the only way to combat is to distract yourself; busy your mind with other things- whether it’s other television shows, movies, music or heaven forbid, the great outdoors. I am not a doctor, but I do feel like I can make some suggestions to help combat Thrones withdrawal.

Watch Luther

It’s another BBC show and it’s another awesome BBC show. Luther is more bruising and raw than Sherlock, easier to understand and follow than Peaky Blinders and significantly less polished and prim than Downton Abbey. It stars Idris Elba as John Luther, a not incredibly original character type- the troubled, but brilliant cop and at times features Ruth Wilson as Alice, a woman who may or may not have killed her parents and then becomes besties with Luther. I also have a pretty sizable crush on her. And she also scares me. She’s adorably dangerous. There’s only three seasons and because it’s British, the first season is six episodes, the next two are four each. Easy to catch up on.

If British copper shows are too high brow…

The Bachelorette yo!

This season the Bachelorette is Kaitlyn, but she’s kind of a supporting character. One dude got hammered on the first night, fell in the pool and butchered Will Ferrell quotes. Two dudes formed a pretty solid bromance until one turned on the other (gasp!,) a guy named Tony, who has the heart of a lion and spirit of a pelican…or something like that…got pissed about the absurdity of the dates and bailed because apparently he doesn’t see how sumo wrestling another bloke is a good way to get to know someone and there’s this kid on the show named Jared who looks like he’s 18 and shops at Hot Topic. Someone he’s still on the show which makes absolutely no sense to anyone in our house including our dog, who is willing to give anyone the benefit of the doubt. The big dust up was when this hombre Nick rolled up. Nick is most famous for attempting to slut shame Super Bachelorette Andi. He’s a creepy creepster, fake as all hell, wears pants two sizes to small and has jumped up to front-runner status without breaking a sweat. Oh and he Kaitlyn totally bumped uglies in Ireland and there is no way that’s going to end well.

And then, there’s also…

Orange is the New Black is just sitting there, waiting to be binge-watched, but I’ve also heard good things about this show Deutschland 83, which is about a spy in Berlin in 1983. Who doesn’t equate summer with German subtitles?

The Internet is always cool

Did you miss any of the big summer music festivals? I spent a week watching sets from this year’s Bonnaroo on the YouTube and it was wonderful, especially My Morning Jacket’s.

Speaking of music…

Dan Auerbach of the Black Keys has a new solo project called the Arcs, featuring dudes he’s worked with when producing people’s records. Their album, Yours, Dreamily, comes out in September and they’ve already released two songs.

I like when a new band you’re already interested has released at least two songs from their upcoming album and both songs don’t sound at all like each other. More often than not it’s a good sign that the album will be good.

Sports!

It can be easy to forget, but baseball is currently in season. I have been following, albeit not that closely. I know the Red Sox are a trash can fire right now (not quite a dumpster fire, but close,) every starting player on the Royals is in the running to be a starter at this year’s All Star Game, the Phillies’ manager just kind of quit and…I think the Giants are good again. I still believe the Red Sox can turn it around. Why not? Crazier things have happened. You know, like this. Oh, Jon Lester. I still love you buddy.

And Jon Lester is a great baseball name. Sonny Gray is still my favorite baseball name currently out there. Here’s my top 10:

10. Chase Utley
9. Brock Holt
8. Jose Altuve
7. Mike Trout
6. Blake Swihart
5. Manny Machado
4. Yasiel Puig
3. Madison Bumgarner
2. Mookie Betts
1. Sonny Gray

But ultimately…

Ultimately there is no cure for Game of Thrones withdrawal.

sad_jon_snow

I know. It’s a bummer.

That’s why with every passing day, another 800 word think piece about the color of Jon Snow’s eyes as he lay there dying shows up on your Twitter feed or rumors about season six casting news are already starting to get out there. Game of Thrones withdrawal is a gosh darn pandemic man. It’s like Bruno Mars or Taylor Swift, sweeping the nation! And I’m not offering up cures, only solutions to help ignore the pain. You know, like a shot of cortisone or Tequila.

Shit man, just get outside. At least if you’re playing corn hole…or baggo…or whatever the hell your particular group of friends call it, you can still talk Thrones.

And that’s all that matters in the end.

Good luck.

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