The Giddy Up America Guide to the Sequester

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The details of the Sequester are essentially lost on me. A sequester sounds like something that would make orange juice. Either way, the basic gist I’ve gotten is teachers might get laid off and air travel is going to be a bigger mess than usual. If you want a good breakdown of the Sequester, I’d recommend this article from Dave Weigel at Slate.

But for the sake of being helpful, Giddy Up America does have a short list of five things that we can guarantee will not be affected by the Sequester.

1.) The new season of Game of Thrones will still be premiering on March 31st.

2.) Jennifer Lawrence is not going anywhere. And Jack Nicholson will have to wait– she’s dating all of us. Are you cool with that Mr. Nicholson?

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Okay, cool. Good talk, see you out there.

3.) March Madness is still going to happen, even though picking a winner will probably be harder than normal.

4.) Kanye West is still going to be pissed about Jay Z and Justin Timberlake’s male bonding trip, this summer’s Legends of Summer tour. But hey, he’s expecting a girl with an unheralded fashionista and that’s exciting news.

5.) Hot dogs will continue to be more popular than Swedish meatballs at IKEA.

Bonus.) Baseball season is still going to happen. Well, unless the NFL decides to hold games in the summer.

John Boehner photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images
President Obama photo by Yahoo News



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