On Wednesday morning our beloved President had himself a handful of racist senior moments on Twitter and Today show anchor Matt Lauer was booted from 30 Rock for being the latest high profile white dude to be accused of sexual wrong doing. That stuff was a bummer, not a great way to start the day. Thankfully, things were able to turn around at least a little bit as the clock struck 8am. The first trailer for Avengers: Infinity War was released.
Take that depressing tidal wave of horrifically, stomach-turning news! It’s super hero time!
There’s Iron Man and Captain America and Thor and the Hulk and Black Panther. The movie doesn’t actually come out until May 4th, which in Trump’s America is for effin’ ever, but giddy the heck up boys and girls.
But you know, May 4th is kind of a long ways off. It’s not even December yet. So how you should you spend these next six months before the movie is actually released? Well, I’m so happy you asked.
Here are some things to keep you busy.
How Did We Get Here?
Yeah, you can do some homework.
Based on this trailer, I think either watching or re-watching some of the more recent Marvel Studios’ movies would be helpful. I know I didn’t totally understand Doctor Strange the first time I saw it and I’m still not entirely sure what happened at the end of both Avengers: Age of Ultron and Captain America: Civil War. I’m sure you could roll into Infinity War somewhat blind and still enjoy yourself, but if we’ve learned anything from the 17 previous installments of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, having some background and context is helpful.
Wonder What’s Up With Captain America
Thanks to some quick research, I can know confirm that at the end of Captain America: Civil War, good ol’ Cap was on sadness street having just crossed bumming boulevard. The rift with Iron Man had split the Avengers in two and following a hell of a dust-up between the two, Cap was last seen headed to Wakanda to freeze Bucky and live out his days on the D.L., which would explain the beard. The only people who grow beards are rock stars in between albums four and five, tired Dads and dudes on the run.
Little known fact about beards is that if you grow one, you are then unrecognizable to law enforcement. Same goes for wearing a baseball hat.
It’s possible then that Captain America shows up in the Black Panther movie, but it’s more likely that we get some clarity about Captain America’s current status in the first twenty minutes of Infinity War. It sounds like he’ll be getting a new shield, so that’s pretty sweet, huh?
Who is This Thanos Character?
Besides someone who obviously works out? That’s a good question and a super important one seeing as how he’s our new big bad. He’s actually not all that new as he’s made cameos in a few movies, either bankrolling Loki in the first Avengers or backing Ronan the Accuser in the first Guardians of the Galaxy. But for the past few years and handful of Marvel movies, all roads have seemed to lead towards a showdown with Thanos.
So with that in mind, who is Thanos?
Thanos is essentially a dictator, a dude hell bent on ruling the universe, and for all of you science nerds out there, you can confirm for everyone that Earth is part of the universe, thus Thanos’ desire to stop by Manhattan. Yet Thanos’ motivation isn’t limited to strictly universal domination. Homeboy has himself a little bit of a crush on a gal called Death and is essentially out there trying to take over the world in an attempt to win her over. You can call Thanos a lot of things, but you can’t say he’s not a romantic.
Yeah, really. Thanos is love sick and in the same way I think that cleaning the kitchen might impress my lady love, he thinks that killing and murdering people will impress his. It’s not what I would do, but then again I’m not a God-like creature looking to impress another God-like creature. Different strokes for different folks I guess.
What Are the Infinity Stones?
Don’t be fooled and think that they are just ways to bedazzle your winter gloves. The Infinity Stones, there are
four six of them, and when united on something like that big mitt Thanos is wearing, known as the Infinity Gauntlet, that lucky duck has the ability to shape reality in a way they deem fit. So in short: the Infinity Stones are like a healthy Golden State Warriors team in that they are trouble by themselves, but damn near deadly when teamed up with one another.
There’s the Space Stone, which was gussied up as the Tessaract in the first Captain America and then in The Avengers. It’s what Loki used in his attempt at world domination. The Reality Stone appeared in Thor: The Dark World, a movie you either saw and regretted seeing or didn’t see and have been told repeatedly not to see. The Power Stone was featured in the first Guardians of the Galaxy and based on the trailer, it looks like Thanos was able to snag it from the Nova Corps, who were in possession of it when we last saw it. THANKS FOR NOTHING GLENN CLOSE!
Two of the stones are currently in the possession of the good guys. Doctor Strange has the Time Stone in a pendant, although he passed it off at the end of his movie. It’s in his circle of friends, though. The Mind Stone sits in the middle of Vision’s forehead and based on the trailer, it might not be there for long.
And finally there’s the Soul Stone. We haven’t seen this one yet, but some have ideas of where or who it might be.
I mean, it’s possible.
Based on this trailer and the scope of it and the size of the cast, I kind of feel like anything is possible with this movie.