GoT Plot Line Power Rankings: Week Four

what-will-season-5-of-game-of-thrones-hold-for-tyrion-lannister-arya-stark-jon-snow-and-daenerys-targaryen-game-of-thrones-season-5-spoilerBefore diving into this week’s episode, “Book of the Stranger,” I’d like to give some love to the unofficial theme song for the episode, none other than “Reunited” by Peaches & Herb.

Why that lovely little song? Well because there were delightful reunions happening all throughout this episode. Two Starks were finally in the same room, Theon returned to Pyke and the warm, loving embrace of his sister, Littlefinger returned to the Vale and his nephew, Robyn, Margaery got to see Loras and finally, Daenerys reunited with her bad ass, fire-resistant, naked self. So yeah, reunited and it feels so good!

On to this week’s rankings.

Giddy Up America’s Game of Thrones Power Rankings: Week Four

1. Behind Every Good (and Resurrected) Man is a Good (and Pissed Off) Woman

A couple things here. First, My Darling Wife was the smart one in our house and wasn’t ready to accept two Starks actually meeting each other until it happened. We’ve been burnt before. I got excited, she exercised caution. That’s why she’s the brains of the operation. But hey now, two Starks finally did reconnect. Oh man I had goose bumps. There have been so many near misses, mainly between Sansa and Arya and now it’s Jon and Sansa back together, reminiscing about the good old days when Sansa treated Jon like the outcast he was and Jon was emo Jon, mopping in the corner, expressing himself via a feelings journal he keep tucked under his curly, black locks. If you think about it though, the wait was worth it and the pay-off so much greater because of the growth both characters had gone through. It made their meeting so much better and impact-full because of the situation they were both in. Sansa needs someone to fuck shit up for her and Jon needs someone to point him in a direction so he can fuck shit up. It’s a win/win- something the Starks haven’t had many of lately. They haven’t even had a win, let alone a win/win. Even a draw would have seemed like a victory before Sansa entered Castle Black.

Count me as someone totally impressed and 100% on board with Zero Eff’s Sansa. Sansa is ready to take the reins and while we’re not saying she can’t do it alone, she needs help. She needs Jon Snow 2.0. And what perfect timing because come on, who wasn’t asking what does Jon do now after last week’s episode. The letter from Ramsey all but sealed the deal- he has their home, their title and their brother. It’s all systems go for the re-taking of Winterfell.

It also looks like it’s all systems go for Tormund to make some serious lover advances towards dear Brienne.

https://twitter.com/VictoriaAveyard/status/732047967830446080?ref_src=twsrctfw

I haven’t wanted two people to get together this bad since I wanted my dog and my daughter to become best friends.

Unrelated note: this has been the funniest season of Game of Thrones so far. Granted, the bar was pretty low for them. But there have been more laughs or mild chuckles already than in almost every season total.

Related note: Davos is going to find out that Melisandre had Shireen burned alive. And when he does, it’s going to be tougher than the meat at Castle Black could ever be.

2. Damn, Danys

Our girl is back!

game-of-thrones-dany-fire

Although before we get too excited, we’ve seen this before. A couple times. Right now Danys is like the Oklahoma City Thunder. They just had a big win, but now what will they do? They’ve had similar wins before, but have never fully capitalized on them, nor have they sustained any serious momentum. Danys can rock the shit out of a mic drop moment, but it’s what she does after is what we’re all looking for now.

On the Differing Opinions on Drake podcast, we have a word for this kind of back and forth.

https://twitter.com/TheDrakeCast/status/730223804849524736

I really hope Danys isn’t a pulling a Bieber this time. If she does, it could be the last straw. The fire, the dragons, the bad assery are all great but eventually it has to mean something.

Oh and Darrio knows about Jorah’s pesky grey scale problem. That’s awkward.

3. Keeping Up with the Lannisters

Let me ask you, if you stepped on a rake and that rake then flew up and hit you smack in the face, would you step on the rake again?

No, you probably wouldn’t. You wouldn’t because you learn from your mistakes and strive to not repeat them. That’s where you and Cersei seem to differ because if the plan that she unveiled this week is any kind of indication, Cersei doesn’t just not learn from her mistakes, she plows ahead full steam, doomed to repeat them.

See, Cersei wanted to get rid of Margaery and the Tyrells, so she empowered the Faith Militant and the High Sparrow to get rid of them. That kind of back-fired though when the Faith Militant not only arrested Mags and Loras, but Cersei. Now Cersei wants the Faith Militant gone. So who does she look to to help do this? Yup, the Tyrells. Now if the Tyrells do this and they get rid of the Faith Militant, do we really think that they are then going to pack up and head home? No way dude. The people love Margaery, hate Cersei and will be grateful to be rid of the Faith Militant. So our girl Cersei is essentially doubling down on the same shitty planning that got the Faith Militant where they are to depose them. Smooth, real smooth.

RBFfePz

I’m sure it’ll work out fine.

On the plus side, we got to see a fun reminder of how super dope Margaery is and how strong she is- especially compared to the two dudes in her life- Loras and King TomTom. #teamMargaery

4. The Leftovers (specifically Danys’ leftovers)

No one is ever going to say Tyrion doesn’t talk a good game but I’m starting to think he may be talking in a different language than everyone else, and that’s not because for the most part, he literally is. Dude may be out of his element a little bit.

5. Uh, Ramsey? We Need to Talk. You’re Scaring the Children

Well, you tried Osha. But that wasn’t Theon you were trying to pull one over on with your sexy lady ways. Ramsey wasn’t born yesterday and dude, he already had a knife in his hand. I just hope the actress playing Osha was paid well because that had to be the shortest call back part ever.

To: Natalia Tena
From: D. Benioff
Subject: GoT casting

Hey Natty Tea, wondering if you'd be down to come on 
back to Ireland for a bit? We're bringing back Osha and 
Rickon and could really use you.
To: David Benioff
From: Natalia Tena
Subject: GoT casting

Hello there! Sure. How long will you need me? 
Are we meeting up with Bran?
To: Natalia Tena
From: D. Benioff
Subject: GoT casting

Not really. Won't be long. 
We really only need you to appear in one scene with a hood over your head and 
then another where you seduce a guy and then he stabs you in the throat.

It’s at that point that they started talking Euros and just like that, Osha was back. Padding that IMDb page, girl. Good for you.

6. Littlefinger, Big Plans

It was only a matter of time until ol’ Littlefinger returned from…where was he again? King’s Landing. Sure. He’s double-crossing someone and doing something, I lose track. Let’s try and recap:

  • Littlefinger seduced and married Lady Arynn, then tossed her through the Moon Door. Now her son, Robyn is Lord of the Vale with Littlefinger pulling the strings.
  • Littlefinger gave Sansa to the Boltons as a way for them to consolidate their power in the north. I’m not sure what was in it for him.
  • Littlefinger went to King’s Landing, spoke to Cersei about something and is now back in the Vale, where he convinces Robyn to mount an attack on the Boltons for (what Robyn believes) kidnapping his cousin Sansa.

I think that covers it. If not for Littlefinger continuing to be a chaos agent on Game of Thrones I’m not sure I care. But he’s proven to be one of those margin players who you have to keep an eye on.

7. Pyke: Least Desirable Island Getaway, 80 Years Running!

Pass.

 

 

 



Categories: Game of Thrones, Power Rankings, Television

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