Royal Blood, a two-man wrecking crew of a band from England, released their second album How Did We Get So Dark? last Friday and truth be told, I’ve lost track as to exactly how many times I’ve listened to it. I had been waiting for a new album from Royal Blood since I first got into them in 2015. The singles they dropped in advance of the album only heightened my level of anticipation.
The album lives up to the hype for me. It’s thumping, it’s down and dirty at times, it’s high and soaring at times. You always worry about a band’s follow-up album to their breakthrough album; whether or not they felt inclined to change things up somehow or fell under the spell of the wrong producer. Thankfully Royal Blood stayed the course.
Royal Blood is one of those bands that makes me want to do things when I listen to them. They make me want to do things I might not either be capable of or flat out willing to do. The idea is there. The idea is influenced by their music, for better or worse.
So here, here is a list of things the music of Royal Blood makes me want to do, listed in no particular order.
Stuff with Cars:
- Get in a high speed car chase
- Go speeding towards a bridge in the middle of it being drawn and jump that son of a bitch
- Do donuts, but filmed in slow-motion
- Go flying over a hill in San Francisco at full speed
- Drive over something in a large truck
- Flip over in a car, the car lands upside down, I get out unscathed and as I walk away, the car burst into flames, but don’t worry I’m fine
- Speed away from a building as it explodes
Stuff Involving Alcohol:
- Get in a bar fight
- Get in a MASSIVE bar fight
- Throw someone through the front window of a dive bar
- Toss someone over a bar
- Do that thing where you drag someone down the top of a bar, knocking over bottles and glasses as you go
- Round-house kick someone
- Play a Royal Blood song on a small stage in a dingy ass dive bar where the audience is two feet from the singer’s face
- Do shots of Yager
- Regret doing shots of Yager
- Shoot pool…but like significantly better than I actually shoot pool
- Hustle someone with my pool-playing ability
- Be called out for hustling someone, then smash a bottle over their head and say something cool like, hate to break it to you, buddy, but you’ve been gotten got.
- I might say something cooler than that
- Run off a cliff and jump into a helicopter that is waiting for me
- Run off a cliff, fall 50 feet into a body of water…it’s cool, there’s no rocks
- Ride a dirt bike in a non-dirt bike friendly setting
- Sky-dive without a parachute
- Jump from the roof of one super tall building to another super tall building
- Run away from a pissed off lion
- Punch a bear in the face
- Eat a whole thing of Ben & Jerry’s
And You Know, Random Stuff:
- Blow a set of speakers listening to “Hook, Line & Sinker“
- Use a drill
- Use a sledgehammer
- Use a drill and a sledgehammer at the same time
- Spit a fireball
- Draw dragons
- Cut down a few trees
- Bake cookies
And you know, if I think about it, I could go on and on but this seems like a good start.