Justin Timberlake and the Rest…

By Ryan O'Connell on 08/27/2013 • ( 3 )

So I’m a little late to the party when it comes to posting a reaction to this year’s MTV Video Music Awards, also known as the “most recent time a controversial appearance on an awards show broke Twitter.” I apologize. I was listening to the soothing sounds of coyotes & crickets and improperly digesting what I was told was chicken tacos. It should be noted that I personally have my doubts as to whether or not they were actually chicken tacos.

Regardless, I watched the show last night and came away with four thoughts.

Giddy Up America’s First Thought About the VMAs…

When Justin Timberlake takes over the world, I hope he does something about the over-bearing presence of college loans in the lives of people under the age of 35.

Don’t laugh, because it’s going to happen. It has to happen. Timberlake was incredible on Sunday night, running, dancing, singing and owning the Barclays’ Center for almost twenty minutes. The choreography was mesmerizing. And the NSYNC reunion? Well, I’m sure the ladies of America were happier than the other four members of NSYNC.

Hey, get over it fellas. No seriously, get over it.

Giddy Up America’s Second Thought About the VMAs…

Um, yeah Maxim, Miley Cyrus is sexy. If you think a crackhead dancing on a street corner is sexy.

It should be noted that all of this would be a complete non-story if Miley were a dude.

Giddy Up America’s Third Thought About the VMAs…

White people be all like this at award shows…

Black people all like this at award shows…

And space aliens be all like this at award shows…

Giddy Up America’s Final Thought About the VMAs…

Apparently someone was trying to get rid of some fireworks outside of the Barclays Center this past weekend and Drake was the only one who would take them. The person selling these fireworks said the money he made would be donated to charity and everyone knows, Drake is a sucker for charity. Whether they actually fit his performance or not was an after thought for Drake. But later, once he got back to his hotel with a full bag of brand new fireworks, he realized the fireworks didn’t really fit his performance. Then to make matters worse, Drake was told he’d be flying back to Canada in the morning. Even Drake can’t get back into Canada with a bag full of fireworks. So Drake thought on it for a minutes before he figured that he might as well use them because he wouldn’t be able to bring them home. And let’s be honest, Drake didn’t get here by throwing money away.

Still a good performance, though.